Sunday, September 15, 2013

i don't think they even heard me.

I think it's fairly easy to see where my head's at by looking at my current library loans. My Nepalese psychiatrist is writing a referral for TMS and I've also written a few emails to hospitals to see if I can participate in free clinical research trials. Living with this kind of psychiatric pain and twisted thought processes is unbearable and I don't even have the energy to pursue the few goals or hobbies I still possess. I think my friends and family are tired of all this hurting and I'm tired of hurting them, too. I don't like my personality any more.
-Anorexia nervosa: let me be / A.H. Crisp
-Eating disorders: management of obesity, bulimia, and anorexia nervosa / W. Stewart Agras
-A state of depression / Margaret McRae
-When living hurts: directives for treating depression / Michael D. Yapko
-Lithium treatment of mood disorders: a practical guide / Mogens Schou
-No time for dances: a memoir of my sister / Gillian Bouras
-Care of the suicidal person / John R. Cutcliffe & Chris Stevenson
-Mentalisation-based treatment for borderline personality disorder: a practical guide / Anthony W. B
-Handbook of borderline disorders / edited by Daniel Silver & Michael Rosenbluth
-Suicide attempts in children and youth / edited by Matilda S. McIntire, Carol R. Angle
-The urge to die: why young people commit suicide / Peter Giovacchini
-Suicide risk: assessment and response guidelines / William J. Fremouw, Maria de Perczel & Thomas E.
-Or not to be: a collection of suicide notes / Marc Etkind
-Traumatic relationships and serious mental disorders / Jon G. Allen
-Brain lock: free yourself from obsessive-compulsive behaviour, a four-step self-treatment method to change your brain chemistry / Jeffery M. Schwartz
-Resilience / Anne Deveson
-Living with Parkinson's: diagonosis, treatment and management - Gabriella Rogers
-After suicide: living with the questions / Eileen Kuehn
-Donnie Darko (film) / directed by Richard Kelly, released 2001