Saturday, December 21, 2013

some situations are so bad that to remain sane is insane.

“I leaned against my door, struggling to catch my breath, and thought that maybe hell wasn’t a place but a thing. A contagious thing. A thing that could creep up that steps, seep through the crack under my door, grow horns and sprout fire - smelling faintly like sulfur. A thing that could sink its tendrils inside and take root, colouring everything grey and distorting a smile into a sneer. And while I got dressed for the play, I swatted at my back and kept running my hands over my stomach because I could feel it, I swear, I could feel it reaching for me, trying to grab hold.” —Megan Miranda

Today I got to cuddle a very sweet baby boy called Benjamin at my local library; he happily giggled and clung to my hip whilst we browsed through the DVDs and self-loan station. His father watched, bemused, as Benjamin pulled my pony tail, played with my necklace and touched my glasses. Last night I had a dream that I was pregnant with dead twins, no one would listen to me as I repeated, again and again, I think my babies are dead, they haven't moved for days...guys?! We need to do something!