Wednesday, February 26, 2014

i destroyed my body for a peace of mind i never got.

1) Put your iTunes on shuffle. Give me the first 6 songs that pop up.
I don't have iTunes but my suggested YouTube videos are: Miley Cyrus's 'We Can't Stop', Nashville's 'No One Will Ever Love You', Taylor Swift's 'Sweeter Than Fiction', Jose Gonzalez's 'Stay Alice' and London Grammar's KEXP live performance in Seattle 
2) If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?
Seriously, I only get one! Not fair...I'd probably have to go with Leonard Cohen, Anna Torv, Dr. Kay Redfield Jamison...the list goes on

3) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.
"He was." - Alice Munro, Runaway

4) What do you think about most?
Life (and death)

5) Ever had a poem or song written about you?
Yes but it wasn't very good
6) Do you have any strange phobias?
Touching flour, dry clay or freshly printed paper (it's a tactile thing)
7) What’s your religion?
I have an open communication with God - probably most simply defined as agnostic or Christian (depending on who you ask)
8) If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?
Window shopping with a hot take away beverage
9) Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?
Actually not that complex because I mostly like solo singers - Horrorshow
10) What was the last lie you told?
I mostly lie through omission; I guess a blatant lie would be how long I actually went camping for
11) Do you believe in karma?
Somewhat - mostly in the positive sense of good deeds being rewarded, not the other way round
12) What does your URL mean?
Surprisingly personal one - I used to write letters to my god mother interstate and that was her postcode
13) What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?
Weakness? Giving up. Strength? Keeping on
14) Who is your celebrity crush?
Too many! At the moment I'm trying to expand my repriote to include more positive body models such as Daisy Lowe, Jennifer Lawrence and Liv Tyler. Anna Torv, Miranda Kerr and Kiko Mizuhara will always have my heart
15) How do you vent your anger?
Writing? Mean texts to other people? Having a nap
16) Do you have a collection of anything?
Black and white photobooth photos (although I haven't added to that collection in a little over a year), post cards from overseas, diaries, nail polish and underwear
17) Are you happy with the person you’ve become?
It's better than nothing
18) What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?
I hate cars honking as they drive past; trams clattering as I travel
19) What’s your biggest “what if”?
I had never met her (multiple hers), my Dad has never gotten so angry, I didn't move out
20) Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?

21) Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.
Right arm: polaroid photo of my friend and I on holiday. Left arm: nothingness
22) Smell the air. What do you smell?
Poor quality air freshener and sweat
23) What’s the worst place you have ever been to?
My ex boyfriend's bedroom
24) Most attractive singer/s of your opposite gender?
Hmm...Joaquin Pheonix playing Johnny Cash in the movie 'Walk the Line'
25) To you, what is the meaning of life?
To love others and be loved in return
26) Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?
I don't drive because I'm too scared of crashing
27) What was the last movie you saw?
That Awkward Moment (Are We Officially Dating?) with Zac Efron
28) What’s the worst injury you’ve ever had?
My physical injuries have been so lame! A dislocated finger from netball - it hurt like hell
29) Do you have any obsessions right now?
Healthy or unhealthy? Jokes. I'm a little bit in love with my sleeping tablets and Harry Potter audio books, in that order
30) Ever had a rumor spread about you?
Sure - but I don't think I was ever worthy enough of any serious rumour spreading

31) Do you tend to hold grudges against people who have done you wrong?
Unfortunately yes - my mother always warns me against this habit
32) What is your astrological sign?
Cancer (apparently we're the most sensitive star sign)
33) What’s the last thing you purchased?
A crocheted dress from ASOS
34) Love or lust?
Love (obviously)
35) In a relationship?
36) How many relationships have you had?
Three...? All seem to have caused some kind of serious psychological change or damage so maybe I need to re-think the whole "relationship" thing?
37) What is your secret weapon to get someone to like you?
I make really good cups of tea and don't mind 'hanging out on the couch' being a date
38) Where is your best friend?
I'm not sure who my best friend is anymore - I guess either overseas or asleep
39) What were you doing last night at 12 AM?
Sleeping in my friend's sister bedroom
40) Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?
Someone who doesn't mind the tough stuff and is willing to be in it for the long haul

41) You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do?
I feel like this would only happen in Paris and in Madeleine (but I would save the dog)!
42) You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid?
I've thought about this a lot lately, whether I was be upset if I received a terminal diagnosis (it's sort of similar to feeling suicidal, only seemingly not your fault). I don't think I would tell anyone, I would prefer to carry on as normal. I would spend my remaining days in bed watching TV, having coffee with my friends and visiting beautiful tree-filled places in the outer suburbs
43) What’s a song that always makes you happy when you hear it?
In These Arms - the Swell Season
44) In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?
Open communication and good sex
45) How can I win your heart?
With cuddles and reassurance
46) Can insanity bring on more creativity?
Absolutely - all the best people are!
47) What is the single best decision you have made in your life so far?
To continue my life when I so desperately wanted to end it
48) What would you want to be written on your tombstone?
This is just a temporary hell, not a permanent one - my love has not left the room, she has only stepped out
49) Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word “heart.”
Red and blood (forever a health science student)
50) Basic question; what’s your favorite color/colors?
My favourite colour is pale pink or pale blue; I actually prefer colour combinations to individual colours because I associate them with emotional states

51) What is your current desktop picture?
My oldest friend and I on holiday recently
52) If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?
This is such an awful question, so I will say: the person who is suffering the most at that very minute and is begging for the end of their pain
53) What would be a question you’d be afraid to tell the truth on?
I don't really have fears about the truth anymore - I am desensitised by telling my story to so many health care professionals. Perhaps questions about my sexuality, they always make me uncomfortable. Or questions about my sexual experiences
54) You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?
Heightened emotional perception and the ability to absorb and lessen psychological pain
55) You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
My favourite day with Pod - lying in bed feeling absolutely at peace and at home
56) You can erase any horrible experience from your past. What will it be?
There are so many...probably the most recent experiences losing a close friend
57) You have the opportunity to sleep with the music-celebrity of your choice. Who would it be?
Olivia Wilde instantly came to mind, although she isn't musical. Robyn? Clare Bowen? I generally only want to sleep with people with whom I admire and respect their professional work
58) You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
Either Boston, Massachusetts or London, the U.K. - I really miss my Danish MI twin
59) Ever been on a plane?
Tons of times - we used to visit my grandparents in Canberra all the time as kids and then I've been on various family holidays and overseas adventures
60) Give me your top 5 hottest celebrities.
I'm trying not to repeat people I've mentioned previously...Elle Fanning, Gemma Ward, Lana Del Rey, Lucy Liu and Winona Ryder